Cowboy Kisses

On the way to her house I invent her a new doorbell.
Everytime this doorbell is rung a cowboy appears from behind a tumbleweed, approaches the visitor, one hand hovering over his gun with deadly intent the other hand extending in welcome. The virtue of the visitor is tested immediately by the appearance of the cowboy both menacing and welcoming at the same time.
If the potential visitor does not flee at this vision the cowboy will nuzzle his well worn and stubbled face against theirs and then whisper come in, come in before delivering a cowboy kiss to the cheek.
This is the signal for the visitor that it is okay to enter.
On the way to her house I realise that I've invented her. How can I go to her house? I haven't even imagined where she lives yet!
I tell my cowboy friend to come out from behind those damn tumbleweeds and come help me find a real girl.
He takes me to the local saloon and we get totally slaughtered on Sioux City sarsaparilla.
He tells me inventing a doorbell powered by cowboy kisses for an imaginary girl is a pretty dumb idea but I point out so is getting drunk on sarsaparilla.
I guess that makes us even.